Winds

Winds

It has no name
But how I wish, for a moment
I could hold back the storm brewing
Like when you hold my hand
But the winds surge through me
Destroying everything
And from my mouth they wail
Arms flail, eyes burn, teeth gnash
And you stand before me unmoved
Foundation on Rock
And you patiently endure the gales
And when they rip me apart
You build me back together
And you give me some of your strength
And the storm subsides
Perhaps forever
Never leave me
Always lead me
Forever mine
And the beast will yet be tamed

Skin

I never dreamt
I’d be so anxious
To shed an identity
As a snake sheds its skin
Aching to grow
And yet bound by
Measurements of the past

I have never been more myself
Than who I am with you
And as I clothe myself
In the blood
And in righteousness
I will clothe myself
In your name
Proclaim to the world
I am yours
As much or more than
I am mine

And my discarded skin
Once so cherished
Is tired and dried by the sun

One Thing

Though my boredom with counting
Causes me to only guess
That I have as many Brothers and Sisters
As there are stars in the sky
One thing I know for certain–
There is only One of you
And you are mine for as many years
As there are stars in the sky
And as numbered as our days may be
We are forever, for we are One
And we shall outlast the stars in the sky.

Not to Flee, But to Find

And we’ll leave.
Not to flee, but to find
How much we have
When your hand holds mine

And we’ll leap.
Not to crash, but to fly
On the limitless joy
Of never saying goodbye

And we’ll fall.
Not to lose, but to gain
This forever love
Of the consecrated flame

And we’ll die.
Not in flesh, but to self
So that together we’ll live
To ring Time’s requiem bell

Know Better

And though I ought not be
Such a Pitiful Pearl
The tears I shed are for me
For the self I wish I was

The me I am is fine
The me I am is nice
But slowly kills my mind
With sloth and routine

And everything else
The me inside despises

Clean in the Mud

Organically born
From the dirt and your rib
Now I return
To the mud and Your grip
And the call for rebirth
Starts in the heart
And permeates my flesh
And I’m dancing, casting
Out Demons and Words
And the Thoughts and the Lies
That have sullied my soul
Today I am new
And forever I’m pure
Clean in the mud,
Part of Earth, in Your blood
And I’m singing Your praise
For each day, it is so.

Purging

I am in a season of purging. Of Spring Cleaning and Life’s Meaning.

I am purging toxins from my body and from my diet. I am purging clutter from my life and my home and that ever-looming To Do List.

I am purging lies.

Lies told to my heart. Lies I tell to myself. Lies that women are force-fed all day, every day.

And it hurts. This Period of Purge, these Days of Detox. There are headaches and heart aches. There is the Refiner’s Fire that burns and cleanses and even though it hurts, and every single molecule of you is screaming in pain, longing for the deceitfully cold shadow of sin, the only relief lies before you.

And soon, like an adrenaline junkie, you crave more. What else can you sacrifice? What else can you cleanse? What else is holding you down. Holding the True You down under that delicious shadow of sin? What lies are you still believing? What lies can your heart fight today?

And that feeling is amazing. Knowing that the freedom from toxins, from junk, from people, from sin, from BLAH, is the most amazing, peaceful place to be. And that you have the power to simply surrender your slavery to God, and to change; with Him, through Him, for Him, is one of the most beautiful realities of my existence. And I am joyful.

A Typical Thursday

A Typical Thursday

Eyes shut, I’m searching,
While eyes wide, I’m dreaming
Mind rut, I’m lurching,
While thoughts wild, I’m scheming
Soul cut, I’m churching,
While soul cried, I’m singing.

What Is?

What Is

What is singing
Sweetly as the birds
If I cannot sing your name?

What is sun shining
Warmly as the truth
If it lights not your face?

What is loving
Purely as the Lamb
If I cannot love you?

For It Knows

For It Knows

And though I would swear
This beating heart would stop
For without you there is less need
It keeps on still because it knows
It will beat with yours again

And though I would think
These laughing lips would silence
For without you there is less joy
They smile still because they know
They will meet with yours again

And though I would wish
This aching soul would fly home
For without you there is less comfort
It soars still because it knows
That your soul seeks mine too